The greatness of Paul...

Can I just say that I am incredibly impressed with myself that I will have 2 blog posts in a matter of one month? Maybe I will get better at this.

I am currently reading a book called "From Persecutor to Apostle: A Biography of Paul." It is by Thomas A. Wayment, who is a professor of religion at BYU. It provides a pretty interesting look into Paul's life, and clarifies a lot of things that I had been wondering about the life of Paul, and how he could possibly have such a turnaround so quickly. It has given me pause several times as I have contemplated how I would have reacted had I been in Paul's shoes... or sandals, more likely. The other day as I was reading, one thing really struck me and has been on my mind ever since. Brother Wayment says, "The greatness of Paul lies not in what he saw on the Damascus road but in how he reacted to what he saw."

I have contemplated this a lot over the past week or so, and have sought to understand exactly what that means--both in general terms, as well as in my life. I have had several thoughts rolling around in my brain, so hopefully I can articulate them clearly.

I think so often we look at people like Paul--as well as modern day Apostles and Prophets--and we think that what makes them so impressive is the revelations they have received, the accolades they have acquired, or the visions they may have seen. And yet, we forget that the greatness precedes the visions and the miracles. What makes them impressive is all of the little things they have done that have made them worthy to receive the rest. It is the seemingly insignificant choices they have made, every day of their lives, to follow the Spirit. It is the visits to the widows, the hours spent consoling those who struggle, and the time spent praying for sheep who are lost. It is the decision to follow the path the Lord has set out for them--even when others might mock or persecute them for doing so. This is what makes men (and women) like Paul great.

I cannot help but think of the Prophet Joseph Smith when I think of others who fall under this category. Joseph Smith saw great things, including, of course, a vision of the Father and the Son, but that is not what made him great. What made him great was his determination to follow through with what the Lord wanted Him to do, despite the fact that men despised and persecuted him. Despite the fact that his wife and children were driven out of their home, in the middle of winter, and made to cross a frozen river to find refuge. Despite the fact that he was wrongfully accused of many crimes, and was ultimately murdered in cold blood for refusing to deny what he knew to be true. That is what made him great. That is what made Paul great. And that is what must make us great.

We may not ever see amazing visions or be asked to preach the gospel in foreign lands (although I know plenty of people who have been so called), but we can still be great. Every day we receive little nudges or pushes in the right direction. Every day the Lord reminds us of people we can bless and of things we can do to change and become more like Him. And how do we react? Do we react in a way that will make us great? Do we follow those promptings, not caring what the repercussions might be or what people might think? Or do we hold back? Do we make excuses for why we cannot act?

In Joseph Smith-History, the Prophet talks about how he often thought it strange that so many people had such strong feelings against him, even though he was just an obscure boy from a small town in New York. And then he says, "However, it was nevertheless a fact that I had beheld a vision. I have thought since, that I felt much like Paul, when he made his defense before King Agrippa, and related the account of the vision he had when he saw a light, and heard a voice; but still there were but few who believed him; some said he was dishonest, others said he was mad; and he was ridiculed and reviled. But all of this did not destroy the reality of his vision. He had seen a vision, he knew he had, and all the persecution under heaven could not make it otherwise; and though they should persecute him unto death, yet he knew, and would know to his latest breath, that he had both seen a light and heard a voice speaking unto him, and all the world could not make him think or believe otherwise.

"So it was with me. I had actually seen a light, and in the midst of that light I saw two Personages, and they did in reality speak to me; and though I was hated and persecuted for saying that I had seen a vision, yet it was true; and while they were persecuting me, reviling me, and speaking all manner of evil against me falsely for so saying, I was led to say in my heart: Why persecute me for telling the truth? I have actually seen a vision; and who am I that I can withstand God, or why does the world think to make me deny what I have actually seen? For I had seen a vision; I knew it, and I knew that God knew it, and I could not deny it..."

I have not seen a vision. In fact, most of the experiences that have convinced me of the reality of my Heavenly Father and His Son, Jesus Christ, and Their love for me, have been seemingly unremarkable. Nevertheless, I DO know that God lives. I know that Jesus is the Christ. I know that He suffered unendurable agony so that we can be clean. I know that Joseph Smith was a prophet of God. I know that God speaks to His prophet today--President Thomas S. Monson. Think of that! There is a man who speaks for God today. What a blessing! I know beyond any doubt that the Book of Mormon is true. It brings peace to my heart and gives me answers to my prayers. And though I may be mocked and ridiculed and reviled for testifying of these things, I know that they are true. And nothing will ever convince me otherwise. I know it, and God knows I know it, and I cannot deny it.